Divorcing A Sociopath

All of which is followed by intense regret, and, subsequently, more impulsive actions; literally anything will do if it stifles the shame spiral. But, as the heady world of BPD will teach you — it happens.

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When dating, I spent most of my time fighting similarly reckless impulses, like the day after my ex boyfriend dumped me and I eyed my phone maniacally, dialing his number on a bi-minutely basis, thankfully never giving in to letting it ring, but certainly wasting time I should have been using to focus on my as yet, six years later, un-handed-in thesis. Or the time I mixed impulsive behavior with another, far less discussed aspect of BPD — hypersexuality — by ordering a man off the Internet.

Before Tinder was a thing, before I could confide in any friends without fear of being judged, before it was socially acceptable, I trawled that online dumping ground, Craigslist, looking for dick. I only did it once, at the peak of a BPD spiral, feeling dank and musty and unloved and unwanted. The knife went unused; we both left unsatisfied.

Ten Tips for a More Stable Relationship

Diagnosis And Moving Forward. To be sure, there are definitely hangovers from my worst bouts of BPD, mainly sensitivity to criticism and my old buddy, fear of abandonment. In five years time, where will we be, eh? While awareness of triggers has improved my quality of life tenfold, often a self-fulfilling prophecy kicks in. Dating with BPD requires work. He listens and I try to talk. When we realize good times are happening, we try to live in their ephemerality, while bad times just have to be tholed with as much mutual support as possible.

Research and understanding will lead to fairer portrayals in the media, and then navigating the waters of BPD dating will be more manageable for everyone involved. Which is to say, we need a little less Dennis Reynolds and a little more substance. Sign in. Get started. The Establishment Follow. BPD In Pop Culture While there are few apt, direct portrayals of BPD in broad society, representations manage to creep into common consciousness through TV, film, and music, leaving the public, at least subconsciously, more aware of the disorder than they may realize.

Most accurate article on BPD we have read—kudos!

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The Challenge of Borderline Personality Disorder in a Relationship | Psychology Today

Make Medium yours. I learned much about her. She has a disorder called borderline personality but I never judged her for it, I have problems of my own. She agrees one day to hook up with me then the next she just wants to be friends. I just want to know what I did wrong for her to push me away and basically friend zone me?

Does she still even like me? I just need more of an insight of this situation. I really like this girl! Most of us are complicated and come with some baggage, and we need someone who holds space for what we have to offer as well as what weighs us down. Some perceive the slightest action as a rejection of them and lash out.

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This may have happened with you and your coworker. Or this could have nothing to do with her mental health. The only way you can know for sure what your coworker is thinking is to ask. Send your crush a text and ask to meet for coffee, just as friends.

Then ask her what changed and listen to her reply which probably has nothing to do with you, but if it does try to listen with an open mind rather than get defensive. In lesbian dating, this refusal to close the door completely can prevent the other person from moving on after a failed relationship.